Beauties & Beaties

Saturday, January 21, 2006

What Women Want

What is the ideal man? It's an age-old question that still baffles many men. Exactly what are women looking for in the "perfect man?" Ben Heller and Kay give their opinions:

He Says: Men are redundant….or so we are led to believe. In this age of women’s liberation, scientific advancement and self sufficient consumerism, the age of man should be over.

The Woman now has the capability to run a house with all of its technological time saving devices, have a career, conceive without any physical interaction, and dare I say it, even find the means to artificially pleasure herself to the point of sexual satisfaction.

So why do men still thrive ? Herein lies the reason why women desperately need men and there is ONE single requirement and attribute for the “Ideal Man”..


Physical Strength. – We are an animal species, and our natural instincts for the survival of the fittest means that many women will choose the mate with the greatest physical attributes to protect both her and her offspring.
Emotional Strength – Chemical imbalances in females during the ovulation and menopausal cycles cause fluctuations in emotional responses. Males maintain a steady outlook throughout their lives and are required for emotional support and stability.
Decision and Leadership Strength – Women have an extremely complex thought and decision making process, and find “grey” areas in every response they are called to make. Men think less, and with a greater clarity, and therefore are able to make quicker decisions, which means that they gain the required Leadership control.

In conclusion, every woman is different. She may choose one or even all of these attributes depending on her own emotional requirements, but these 3 masculine advantages all have an influence when she chooses her “Ideal Man."

She Says: First, the ideal man must earn high scores in the “hubba-hubba” and “ha-ha” categories. However, individual standards for attractiveness and humor are variable and even inexplicable. As a result, there is a woman out there swooning for Carrot Top, dreaming of making sweet vegetable babies with him on their dining room table. Terrifying but true, folks.

Notably, most women also want a guy who is a “guy.” This doesn’t necessarily mean a scratching-his-nuts-on-the-sofa and watching football “guy” or a saving the damsel in distress “guy,” though each of these have their charms. Instead, he gets high regard for that special something about him that is strong and different from a woman, including a solidly serviceable penis and/or tongue. Again, tastes vary from person to person. Lastly, kindness and a nice booty also make for an ideal man as well. Especially the booty.


Blogger Siren said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

7:57 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think it's dependent on the age of the woman, too. Younger women are looking for "Mr. Right"; older women are looking for "Mr. Employed".

Sorry, I screwed up the first comment :)

8:00 AM  
Blogger Willow said...

That last picture looks really uncomfortable.

8:11 AM  
Blogger :P fuzzbox said...

I thought women just kept men around because b.o.b.'s can't mow the lawn.

11:40 AM  
Blogger Bruce said...

I would think stability would place high on a woman's list when looking for a man.

1:25 PM  
Blogger Pixie said...

I can mow a lawn, change a fuse, unblock a sink.But alas I have trouble opening new jars.Everyone needs a man even if its to open jars.

Oh and to snuggle up to on a cold night.

1:40 PM  
Blogger RT said...

Who needs a man? I mean sure, it would be nice to have a body attached to that penis, but it's not necessary.

Personally, I like what Ben said. It's a load of crap, of course, (we're looking for a companion, not a father figure,) but it would be nice to see men act with a little more maturity.

It's funny, some guys are always asking what a girl wants in a guy, but what the ones that are usually asking really want to know is 'what does this particular little super hottie 18 year old want with this 30 year old unemployed impotent ex-ho?'

Forget it bub, it ain't gonna happen, so quit trying to pry us for knowledge that you can use to hook up with the kiddies.

9:24 PM  
Blogger The Phoenix said...

Suzi, taking that last picture was VERY uncomfortable. I wasn't sure if I should've worn the Superman or Batman. But since my nickname is "Man of Steel..."

I'm so NOT what women want.

Now I'm gonna go sit on the couch, scratch my balls, and watch Pittsburgh get to the Superbowl.

8:46 AM  
Blogger Jamie Dawn said...

Good job people. Here's my two cents:

"Males maintain a steady outlook throughout their lives and are required for emotional support and stability." Uh, have you ever seen Barney Fife? I know a few men like that.

As for the scratching of nuts being considered "charming," I don't share that same opinion.

Mutual attraction, sense of humor, and lots of money are very desirable qualities. But, if I love a man with all my heart and soul, I want for him to love me the same way. If I know that he will walk through fire for me, that man will have my undying devotion for all my life.

12:23 PM  
Blogger Dear Jane said...

well done Ben & Kay. But I don't think there is an ideal man or woman...sometimes you have no idea what attracts you to a person or why. But I do think there is someone (or two or three) for everyone...

1:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Very well done!

All I can say is that if being the ideal man requires wearing that ... THING, then I'm happy to be less than ideal.

-- david

5:20 AM  
Blogger Andie D. said...

OK, so the thong doesn't do it for me. But the ass? AHEM!

I too think that as a woman becomes more mature, she can appreciate a man more as an object. Not that she doesn't want a companion, it's just that she also wants a body.

Perhaps it is what many men feel before they mature. Karmic payback or something.

8:20 PM  
Blogger David Amulet said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

4:06 AM  
Blogger Eve said...

"Ha ha factor" is HUGE. But I also have the man's man thing as well.

Metrosexuals are fun to hang out with... I would just HATE to date one!!!

7:01 AM  
Blogger Ranea said...

You cant forget the high shelves,men are good for that.And telling You that You need to get your car serviced.

6:39 AM  
Blogger Mojotek said...

Great post! Guess I need to work on my ass a little bit. I don't think I'd look exactly like that in a superman thong.

Wait a second... they make a Superman thing for men??

10:19 AM  
Blogger phred said...

A ''man'' wearing a thong, I`m sorry but, that`s GAY.

2:55 PM  
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